Saturday 5 December 2009

Starfox Adventures (Gamecube)

Quick question: is it wrong for cartoon animals to be sexy? I only ask because, in Starfox Adventures, one of the characters you play is a blue female fox. A nubile, young, blue female fox. With pert breasts. Dressed in a skimpy bra and a loincloth.

OK, so I realise that was probably a stupid question and that I might have just sent fifty percent of all readers scurrying off to find a copy of Starfox Adventures, but just hold your horses there... it's probably not worth it.


There. I've saved you the bother.

Everyone probably remembers Starfox (or Starwing) from the days of the SNES... it was something of a flagship title. The fast-paced flying and shooting action was, if not quite revolutionary, then at least tremendously entertaining. Starfox Adventures gets off to a good start... you're on the back of a flying dinosaur-thing, shooting down a giant ship. Or not... once you disable its guns, you land on the ship, and it all falls apart to a degree.

Starfox Adventures sees you roaming around foreign lands... not in a spaceship, but on foot. While that's not necessarily a bad thing, it's not really what you want from a Starfox game. But it's definitely not what you want from a Starfox game when you're saddled with a terrible camera. Many's the time when you'll be running into the camera, and you have to press the shoulder button to re-align. That's very frustrating and not really acceptable.


What if he comes at you with a point-ed stick?

Fortunately, the game appears to be easy enough for that not to matter. Really, despite the pert, nubile, skimpily-dressed blue fox, this is a game for kids, and that's a shame given that the biggest market for this game is probably the thirty-year-old age group. Even when you revert to controlling Fox himself, it's a simple, bog-standard run, jump and solve the simple, signpostged problems type of game. Starfox Adventures is not enough Starfox and too much Adventure, and that's really the biggest problem of all.

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